I agree this is the most secure solution without compromise and doubts what third party solution︆ is and what is not a honeypot
I was running my own XMPP server for︇ years as described but we ended up using it internally with my closest coworkers because︈ the client apps mostly suck big (despite there are tens of options) and it's mission︉ impossible to guide anyone outside to install the right one for his OS/device and responding︊ to complaints why it gets disconnected from time to time, why notifications are not reliable︋ and file upload doesn't work at all - it's simply not worth the hassle to︌ setup for occasional communication
so I ended up using signal, wickr or session which is︍ good enough for my threat model however it's worth noting that these new apps are︎ impossibly immature and even basic stuff like full text searching the messages are pain in️ the a*s - ICQ 25 years ago was on another level
I was running my own XMPP server for︇ years as described but we ended up using it internally with my closest coworkers because︈ the client apps mostly suck big (despite there are tens of options) and it's mission︉ impossible to guide anyone outside to install the right one for his OS/device and responding︊ to complaints why it gets disconnected from time to time, why notifications are not reliable︋ and file upload doesn't work at all - it's simply not worth the hassle to︌ setup for occasional communication
so I ended up using signal, wickr or session which is︍ good enough for my threat model however it's worth noting that these new apps are︎ impossibly immature and even basic stuff like full text searching the messages are pain in️ the a*s - ICQ 25 years ago was on another level