movings funds out of joint account with urgency: ideas?

[user9823671]

Marriage is currently falling apart, the wife seems to be having a a crisis / breakdown and (from my point view) is acting crazy. Details not important.

Got about $80k in a joint account, that would legally be mine (I had it in savings fro mbefore marriage, but we spent it over the years, but through work the money is in the account) but with her acting crazy, I don't trust her.

Problem is, I do not live in my home country (UK). I live in her home country (Ecuador). So sending the money here to my personal account "might" make it easier for her to claim 50% of.

I have an unused Transferwise and bankera account.
Another problem is, the money in the account is from freelancing work online where tax wasn't paid. It all went through paypal and my UK persona, then I would transfer here. Tax no owed to UK as am not resident. Tax should have been declared in Ecuador, but no one pays tax and well I didn't get round to sorting it out.


Do I have any options? Open a bank account somewhere? onshore / offshore what country? Move (x) amount to it? Possible? Risks?


cheers

 

[Martin Everson]

user9823671 said:
Marriage is currently falling apart, the wife seems to be having a a crisis / breakdown and (from my point view) is acting crazy. Details not important.
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Totally normal sadly.

user9823671 said:
Got about $80k in a joint account, that would legally be mine (I had it in savings fro mbefore marriage, but we spent it over the years, but through work the money is in the account) but with her acting crazy, I don't trust her.
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So original 80k is gone and new 80k in joint account is earned during marriage? If so money is both of yours. Anyway if you don't trust her you should NEVER have got married.....lol.

user9823671 said:
Problem is, I do not live in my home country (UK). I live in her home country (Ecuador). So sending the money here to my personal account "might" make it easier for her to claim 50% of.
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She is entitled to half the money if I understand correctly. The money was earned during the marriage after original 80k spent or not?

user9823671 said:
Tax should have been declared in Ecuador, but no one pays tax and well I didn't get round to sorting it out.
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Yikes. So you have undeclared income and a wife that could take that income from the joint account. Not good. You need to get legal advice and ask the bank to freeze the account in the meantime. Try and work things out with her and buy yourself time to come up with a proper solution to the crisis.

If freezing does not work you can try Ital bank in Puerto Rico to hold half the money temporarily. Don't take it all. But moving money is NO real solution and can just make matters legally worse so speak to lawyer. Money is both of yours and you are depriving her of access to it by moving it if you do so. She will be the victim in such a case if money is moved as this may cause her unnecessary hardship....but I don't know in an out of you and your wife's finances.

Last edited: Sep 8, 2021
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[user9823671]

Not looking like any chance of working things out. She's going down the path of conspiracy and last weekend converted to Islam, although admits she knows nothing about it and converted so she can learn. Whole thing is a fucking mess. She has agreed verbally personal assets we had before marriage are ours to keep, she has taken out an inheritance she got from grandmother. But she is unaware of what would have been my personal assets which would be more than hers.

Although it's a joint account she doesn't have access as doesn't remember her passwords and I've always handled transferring money from UK to our Ec bank. So I just want what has been agreed to (verbally) as mine out before she decides to donate it all to the mosque or whatever crazy bulls**t she will do next.

Anyway if you don't trust her you should NEVER have got married.....lol.
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I did, hence the joint account. But alas, she's gone off the deep end.

And she won't have any unnecessary hardship, she is, as always has been leeching off me and will for the next 16 years based on what I need to keep paying her (according to lawyer). The money I want moved out as it's there to pay for kids' education / university. Always meant to get it into a savings account just never got round to it.

But yes as you say, the whole thing is a mess and probably I am going to make things worse - but let's hope not eh?

 

[JackAlabama]

Well don't wanna discourage you but youre a gringo in a latam country going against a local (assuming she is ecuadorian )...
Better to make a deal and try to negotiate a clean cut and look around elsewhere.

 

[Vor]

id just take what is yours, file for dissolution of the marriage, and leave the country.

 

[Martin Everson]

Ok so your money is safe.

I would definitely think about your safety first. If she has totally lost her mind then you don't want to meet with her without a lawyer present. She can claim anything including you assaulted her or abused her verbally or physically etc. You could end up in harms way on trumped up charges. Stay the hell away from her. Let your lawyer deal with it all. Hell have no fury like a woman scorned.

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[M56]

Take what you can, hide the overseas cash. Buy a one way ticket out and get home safely. Its a bad situation but better to cut your ties and go now with what you have and the nest egg in touch. If she comes after you for money in the UK get your lawyer to say she is not of sound mind and before a case can be brought you want a physiological evaluation done by a registered uk doctor and have it bought before the court.

 

[Martin Everson]

M56 said:
If she comes after you for money in the UK get your lawyer to say she is not of sound mind and before a case can be brought you want a physiological evaluation done by a registered uk doctor and have it bought before the court.
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lol...sounds like you done this before ns2

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[M56]

Martin Everson said:
lol...sounds like you done this before ns2
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No I've not thank god. But I've had friends go through similar in Thailand and uae etc. Best to go with what you can get and your sanity than stay and lose everything and become suicidal or locked up.

 

[Martin Everson]

Yeah your right I guess. Some of these banana republics the legal system is not impartial enough to stay and fight a case especially if your a gringo.

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[thirtyniner]

M56 said:
No I've not thank god. But I've had friends go through similar in Thailand and uae etc. Best to go with what you can get and your sanity than stay and lose everything and become suicidal or locked up.
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This is what happens to most men when they meet a Latin (and younger then them) lady, which will make them crazy, "horizontally" speaking, and make them forget about some basic principles about marrigage or any sort of contract they sign into.

 

[thirtyniner]

M56 said:
Take what you can, hide the overseas cash. Buy a one way ticket out and get home safely. Its a bad situation but better to cut your ties and go now with what you have and the nest egg in touch. If she comes after you for money in the UK get your lawyer to say she is not of sound mind and before a case can be brought you want a physiological evaluation done by a registered uk doctor and have it bought before the court.
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This is the better solution out there .... if there are no kids involved. They are the biggest leverage over you if this is the case.

 

[Martin Everson]

thirtyniner said:
This is what happens to most men when they meet a Latin (and younger then them) lady, which will make them crazy, "horizontally" speaking, and make them forget about some basic principles about marrigage or any sort of contract they sign into.
Click to expand...

Worse case you could end up in this situation 😕.


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[troubled soul]

Now a day, It is better to stay single.
Fake feminism victimize innocent men.

 

[Martin Everson]

azb1 said:
Now a day, It is better to stay single.
Fake feminism victimize innocent men.
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I agree.

I made a strong argument against marriage in below post a year ago smi(&%.

Martin Everson said:
Yes it is cheaper to have an expensive whore than to go through marriage and divorce. You get the benefit of certainty, the woman knows what is expected, you know your capital outlay from day one and with a good payment plan can be very cost effective. The woman can also be swapped out for a younger version so you don't suffer depreciation and health care costs - dentists and medical care is not cheap. There is also no balloon payment at end....sorry I meant divorce settlement. Also there is no nagging, no undue demands, pressure and you keep your freedoms, privacy and all your assets without having to share or declare them to her. It is a win win for both parties.

In short a whore is a cost effective vehicle and an eloquent allocation of capital than a marriage over the medium to long term. With minimal initial down payment (wedding & dating) and ballon payment at end (divorce) you also get benefit of not being tied into a long contract like a cellphone plan. Think of it as a pay as you go cellphone plan. The little higher you pay each top up for the service allows you an easy opt out with no minimum commitment period.
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[user9823671]

M56 said:
Take what you can, hide the overseas cash. Buy a one way ticket out and get home safely. Its a bad situation but better to cut your ties and go now with what you have and the nest egg in touch. If she comes after you for money in the UK get your lawyer to say she is not of sound mind and before a case can be brought you want a physiological evaluation done by a registered uk doctor and have it bought before the court.
Click to expand...

Not an option as would have to leave the kids with her and as she isn't just "focusing on her happiness" is somewhat neglecting them (not neglect neglect, just not taking take of them as good as usual). It's like a text book mid life crisis, but the whole religion conversion thing just adds another dimension to it, that people tell me "she has another man (muslim) somewhere and had to convert in order to marry again" which makes sense. Either that or she's being scammed online in some vein, but she's being erratic that even her friends had confided in me she isn't acting like herself

JackAlabama said:
Well don't wanna discourage you but youre a gringo in a latam country going against a local (assuming she is ecuadorian )...
Better to make a deal and try to negotiate a clean cut and look around elsewhere.
Click to expand...

yes this is a worry, especially as the laws are all set up to f**k the father other.

thirtyniner said:
This is what happens to most men when they meet a Latin (and younger then them) lady, which will make them crazy, "horizontally" speaking, and make them forget about some basic principles about marrigage or any sort of contract they sign into.
Click to expand...

Situation isn't quite that (although she did make me crazy horizontally haha). She's the same age (give or take a year) and met her when was a dirty penniless barefoot hippy travelling through central / south america 16 years ago. Been married 15 years and got 3 kids.


Am actually quite worried for her, separation is one thing, sad but happens, but this crazy bulls**t! Ignoring the concern for her personal safety, worried that she'll end up "investing" the money (she said this the other day) to some scam confidence man online she has "fallen in love with" and it's the kids who will suffer as those funds are for private education / univerisity.


so ignoring the advice to not do it, how much can I transfer to transferwise / bankera without trigging issues? 5k? 10k? 20k? 50k? 100k? $5?

 

[troubled soul]

Martin Everson said:
I agree.

I made a strong argument against marriage in below post a year ago smi(&%.
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Golden Word,
When you are rich, It is better to stay single , have fun and keep spending money on yourself .Finding Love for rich men is like finding "philosopher's stone". Because In today world, When you get married , today or tomorrow ,wife finds divorce alimony more appealing than the husband.

Even staying away from making so called "friend", They will show you their true color when you face difficulty in Life.
When you have money, Always Keep in mind that "Everybody Has an Agenda"

You have to constantly question the motives of everyone you interact with.
Being rich and careless is not good combination in today's world.

People love to put you down when you are rich. They are only nice when they want something from you.
People who you help you most or get most benefit out of you are the One who enjoy your downfall.

Last edited: Sep 17, 2021

 

[Martin Everson]

user9823671 said:
Not an option as would have to leave the kids with her and as she isn't just "focusing on her happiness" is somewhat neglecting them (not neglect neglect, just not taking take of them as good as usual). It's like a text book mid life crisis, but the whole religion conversion thing just adds another dimension to it, that people tell me "she has another man (muslim) somewhere and had to convert in order to marry again" which makes sense. Either that or she's being scammed online in some vein, but she's being erratic that even her friends had confided in me she isn't acting like herself
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Damn I feel for you. Difficult to say what to do the more I hear about your story 😕.

azb1 said:
Finding Love for rich men is like finding "philosopher's stone". Because In today world, When you get married , today or tomorrow ,wife finds divorce alimony more appealing than the husband.
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Yeah good luck to a rich man trying to find a woman who really loves him. You need to be like Akeem from Coming to America and pretend your poor to find real love. Otherwise you will just hit gold digger after gold digger.

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[jjrapy]

You need to know the right place to look for it.. Don't pretend finding the “love of your life” at some wild party (you could buy highly improbably smi(&%) or something like that.
It depends on what values and behaviors are you looking at. Of course at a show off place like Dubai or expensive places maybe you'll find but mostly you'll find gold diggers that will approach you with interest behind.
Try at the supermarket or stuff like that lol.

 

[Martin Everson]

jjrapy said:
Try at the supermarket or stuff like that lol.
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So a rich man won't end up with a gold digger if they look for a woman in their local supermarket your saying? ns2

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